I’ve known Luke since we were both about fourteen. We’ve been married almost eight years, and together nearly seventeen. Yet there are some times when I step back and think, “who are you?” There are still so many things I don’t know.
This thought came to me this week as I am planning for Luke’s birthday. I want to make him a cake but realized that I have no idea what kind of cake he likes. I’ve seen him eat cake, I know he likes cake, but what is his favorite? Then I wondered about what to make for his birthday dinner. I usually make steak for his birthday, but is that his favorite? That made me think that I don’t know anything about Luke’s favorites? What’s his favorite band? His favorite ice cream? His favorite color?
Maybe it’s the fact that we’ve grown up together and been together for so long that I never took the time to pointedly ask what his favorites were. Maybe I’ve forgotten. Maybe it’s a good thing. At least I can’t say that being together for so long is boring, that I know everything that there is to know about him. I guess if I could offer any advice for long, happy marriages it would be to, whether accidentally or intentionally, forget things about each other. It certainly makes life more interesting.
I told Luke that I felt like I barely knew anything about him last night, and as he was leaving for work I asked him what his favorite color was. He smiled through his motorcycle helmet and said, “black”. The little bugger…